Chapter 3: Everytime

Lana leisurely woke up around 9:30, still thinking as she lay in bed. Thinking about a lot of things. Mama tops the main focus. What was she going to do? Being an only child, raised and cared for by her mother when her father left them when she was just a baby. The bastard. She goes back to her apartment, she's still alone. Still alone. Cold and faded.

She stretched her tired muscles on the bed and flipped the covers half way over. She sighed seating up rubbing her eyes all the while. Her legs swung over and she stood up walking over to the dresser mirror. Looking at the person in the mirror, she shook her head. She looked so haggard, drawn-out, tarnished. Her eyes read of unresolved pain, shock, and swollenness. She walked over to the bathroom sink and began washing her hands. She dried them and went to put on her shoes. Her hair was a force to be reckoned with so she tied it up in a messy pony tail.

She walked out and closed the door only to bump into Justin. He quickly put some space between them, afraid of getting hurt again. When she held her hands in the air, he rested easy a little. "Whoa, don't hurt me girl."

She shook her head, "Excuse you but you did bump into me. I think there was a time or two when you did the exact same thing to me.  Were you waiting out here for me or something?" she noticed he was dressed casually in regular jeans and an abercromie muscle shirt.

"I was going to see if you wanted some breakfast."

"Oh, um OK." she followed him silently to the kitchen, playing with her hands as she sat down.

As he was pouring the cereal, he started talking, "So, what are you doing today?"

She tucked a piece of hair behind her ear and looked around, "Uh, going to the hospital. I'm talking a week off of work to make arrangements for the funeral."

He placed the bowels on the table and they started eating silently. As Lana eat she began thinking about the funeral. She doesn't feel she's ready to say good-bye. Its too soon. Way too soon. Than, she thinks about who she is. What is she exactly? She used to think she was a girl that fell in love with the most loved man on the planet. Was she still that girl?

She finished the last of the cereal and got up placing it in the sink. She slowly felt arms wrap around her body and a chin resting on her shoulder. "I'll take care of you, Lana. In these times especially."

She wanted to believe him. More than anything, wanted to love him. No, she couldn't. No more falling in love. She's done. She took his arms off her and walked to the door but not without him clasping her arm. "Don't please. I'm just trying to help you. This is all I want. The way I feel about you won't go away, I can't help it. Lana, you need somebody. I can help you through all of this. Just let me."

She shook her head. It was a hoax. She can't trust him. "No, I -- I can't. It was a mistake coming here and --" he cut her off.

"What?!"

She closed her tired eyes, "Please, none of this has anything to do with you. I don't want you involved in this."

"You already involved me when you called me, Lana. What, am I supposed to sit back and just drop you on the street without anything? I'm sorry I can't just do that. Weather you like it or not, you mean everything to me and I will stop at nothing until I feel that you're OK."

"Justin stop it! I can't let you -- just stop this! Please take me home, I have so much to do already and I don't need this too." She covered her face with her hands.

Justin sighed, calming taking her hands from her face looking in her scared eyes, "Hey, Lana? It's going to be alright. Come on."

He tried bringing her arms around for a hug but she pushed back and opened the door. She silently walked to the door of his escalade. "No, take me home now."

Justin was starting to get emotional now. It made it him think of that time in December when she was there for him. Now its like they're strangers. All because of his stupid mouth. He took a deep breath unlocking his doors as they got. She buckled up as he started the engine making the radio turn on to the perfect song at the moment.

'And I never thought I'd feel this way
And as far as I'm concerned
I'm glad i got the chance to say
That I do believe I love you

She switched the station to Kiss FM. JoJo the DJ was chatting with none other than Miss Britney Spears about her engagement to back up dancer Kevin Federline. Justin's mouth formed a thin line. 'Britney.' Well, he's happy for her. Still, they have unfinished business even though he came right out and told the world they had sex and joked about it. Who could forgot that trusty video making Brit just come out the unfaithful one and him smelling like roses. He handled everything badly. It seems everything he said turns back on him. Than, there's her song to him. Nobody even knew, he cried so hard when she wrote that song. Even listening to it now made him want to brake his radio.

'And everytime I try to fly
I fall without my wings
I feel so small
I guess I need you baby
And everytime I see you in my dreams
I see your face, it's haunting me
I guess I need you baby'

He couldn't take it, he went to switch the station when her hand reached out just in time to change it. Her eyes shifted upward penetrating his. Lana's finger turned off the radio as she pulled back but his hand was still on top of hers. For a moment there was a silence, than --

"Take me back, Justin."

He nodded slightly and started driving to her house. Man, that was a short ride. They pulled up to her sidewalk and Justin turned of the engine, glancing the girl who basically leapt from him running for her door, not forgetting his heart too. Something was so wrong about this. He saw something, he did. He knew he did. It was all when they touched. It was them. They were magnets. He found himself getting out and running up to her.

"Lana, hold up!"

She was so close. She turned around, "What?"

Fuck this. He smashed his lips onto her without any permission and plunged his heart and soul into that connection. Lana was too shocked to breath, but who in the hell was she fooling? Yeah she wanted him. She wanted that kiss. She depended it first by seeping her tongue inside exploring what was missing all her curled up nights. She dreamed of this man. And no, she was not going to pull away. Oh shit, something was wrong. Her stomach gave out and she pulled from his scorching lips.

She doubled over in pain clutching her stomach whiled Justin looked on and tried to help, "Lana, what? What's wrong?"

She finally looked up as her normally ice blue eyes gave a pasty white glow on them, "I don't know exactly." She was breathing heavy too.

Justin backed up in a scared shitless fashion, "Holy fuck! Lana, your eyes! What's going on? Tell me please!"

Her stomach smudged again and she groaned from the shooting pain. She still managed to stand up, "I have to go." And she left dragging her feet as fast as she could.

Justin grabbed his head. He was too freaked out to move anything else. "Oh my god! Something fucked up is going on now."

Feedback | Chapter 4 (coming soon!)