Chapter 16: Dirrty

Aurora's POV

“So, OK, why were you kicked out again?” Fiona asked.

Didn’t really want to delve to deeply again, “I couldn’t afford my place and they evicted me. I’m currently looking for a place to stay at the moment.”

I knew that probably wasn’t the smartest thing to say but they don’t seem to mind what I tell them.

The lanky woman with green eyes stopped in her position, “So, does that mean you’re homeless or what? Where’s your stuff?”

Not much for material possessions, I really only took 2 things, “I’m wearing them pretty much. I lost my notebook though. God dammit! I left it there of all places I had to lose it there!”

“Where?” They all asked.

I brushed it off lightly, “Never mind. You guys just moved here huh?”

I wanted to get to know these people for some odd some.

The girl with green eyes responded, “Yeah, Phil’s just katoing until he can get a place of his own but we’re newbies here. Did you wanna stay, we’re gonna order some Chinese take out?”

I knew I was starving. It was around 6 hours since I ate last Maybe for only now I could. They seem nice enough. “OK, but you guys don’t have to go outta your way you know?”

The green-eyed girl came around the table and picked up the phone, “Its no big deal we always order too much anyway and its always us, we can let another newbie join into to the fun. What’s your preference, would you like anything special for you?”

Such open generosity, I was fuming with why this was happening all too easily, and to me. I was vague once again, “Um, well, you guys are inviting me and I’m not paying for this so whatever you get I’ll wanna eat.”

“Flo just order up 3 times what we usually get. She’s being too nice now.” Fiona quipped as she turned back around.

“K, everyone wants the usual got it!” Flo started dialing up the order.

Fiona took it upon herself to get to know me personally. I missed that when I used to have friends. Hopefully I can still wake up and all this is still there.

“So, how old are you?”

I folded my knees onto the couch and sat relaxed, “21, just turned actually.”

“Really? When was that?” She took a swing of her cream soda.

“November actually. The 13th. I think I was still at my shitty place until I was kicked out. Guess sort of an early birthday present.”

“That sucks.” She leaned back further, “Once that almost happen to my mom back in Boston, I was a Southie. Still kinda am which is why everyone says I’m so weird.”

I smiled. Trading thoughts with girl came so natural to me and I had no clue why. I wasn’t about to judge. I could always use more friends. Or any for that matter. Felt refreshing for a change.

I heard noises from afar. The green-eyed girl came up to us and sat next to Fiona with her legs curled up behind her. “Y’all talking about me now?”

Fi shoved her over in annoyance, I laughed, “Not everything is about you, you know. So what’s up girl?”

Not quite used to the treatment, I attempt to play along, “Not much, you guys are just so nice I can’t believe this.”

“Well, believe it. People like Fi and Mer would invite the crazies in the crib if I wasn’t such a good brother.” I heard behind me.

That was when I saw his eyes. He had eyes like a mutant. Like something out of an X-Men flick. They were piercing, something I longed have directed at me in an intense manner. I could bathe myself in his stare for the rest of the night. Instead, so sadly, I opted the later and looked away shyly.

“I’m sure that’s not completely true. You guys probably had plans before I came.” I shifted around like a Jack Russell Terrier.

I observe Fiona narrow her green eyes at her brother and placed her attention back at me. “Don’t believe it. He lies like it’s a first language. It shows too, uneducated asses like himself are all cops cuz they got nothing better to do with themselves.”

I giggle and cover my mouth. I felt bad laughing at that but I was still in shock of all this fantastic living. The fact that they’re letting me join in is absurd.

I excuse myself for the restroom and stand up from the living room. There were still boxes laying astray and bits and shards of nic knacks scattered about every square inch of the apartment. As I made my way towards the bathroom, I scanned my way, looking carefully around, soaking in the memories of the fact that this house is real and so was I.

The bedrooms barely had much life in them. There were at least 4 that I saw. I had an itch to scavenge through them and find out different things about these girls. I’m assuming that guy with the eyes also stays here.

The bathroom was the first to get the treatment I noticed. The pink was obvious enough that it belonged to the sisters. The mirrors were as clear as a day in Boston. There was this floral homey feeling being in here. It smelled like 20 musk bottles and that new paint refurbished.

I had this feeling in me to touch, feel, and study everything around me. I’ve never been around so many things in my life. I’ve never been around such cleanliness, all precise and orderly. I wished for this kind of life. I wanted to see this before my life ends. This was just the bathroom and it was bigger than my bedroom back in Brooklyn.

I don’t think my life could ever go back to the streets. That life for the a month was the most dreadful and vile thing ever. I was cold for most of the time and I had no resources. I was scared. Than Justin. I can’t go back to him ever. I can’t see him while I’m like this. He couldn’t know me, he can’t remember me.

My eyes felt drowsy and head felt heavy. I needed sleep and I needed a bed. I felt like falling over on something and just fading myself away in dreamland. I haven’t had a good night’s sleep in years. I didn’t want to be rude. Fiona’s the nicest one out of all of them. You can tell she’s into some kind of Mia Farrow outreach system. She’s really approachable and it calms me because its been a while since I’ve felt so safe. Well, I won’t get into that now. As soon as the food’s coming, I have no clue what I’m going to do.

“Hey, Aurora! Wanna hit the Crystal Lounge with the girls?” Mel came behind and almost scared me out of my skin.

I frown, that was so sweet. All I had was what I was wearing. “I have noth--”

She shushed me with her hand, “Say no more, Fi has some stuff I got her last year that she never wears. It’s for emergencies. Come on, girl. Let’s get dirty!”

---

Justin’s POV

“Today was odd, I was scraping myself today. I felt so alone that its almost a part of my existence. I’m living in this rundown ballet studio and its so much better than the streets. Wouldn’t want to run into that cop again. Oh jeez, the way his eyes cornered me. They stopped me in my place. I keep seeing him, just a cop, and he’s everywhere. I mean everywhere. I would like to say in my nightmares but who am I kidding, he won’t read this so it really shouldn’t matter what I say. This is my book. I write in it everyday. Too bad I couldn’t be a writer I’d make a good one I believe. Enough of that. It’s been too long since I’ve eaten anything. Last night someone answered my prayers and left an uneaten tuna sandwich. It was great but now its 6 in the afternoon and my stomach’s been bothering me all day. I had some complimentary coffee and some water from the jug next to it. I didn’t believe I was caught by anyone so I stole some sugar cookies from the plate and stuffed them in the napkins that were there. The woman at the front desk I believe I forget her name. It’s a good thing she’s pretty dense…”

I couldn’t read anymore. I had gone through about 15 pages of her notebook and with each word my soul dies. A piece of me wishes things could be different. Who am I kidding? Why am I being tortured by this girl? Why am obsessing with her well being? Questions like these I ask myself since the time I first saw her. I want to protect her. How do you protect someone you can’t have?

But it didn't seem to me like that's all there was. Why did she leave me? I can't believe it still. I shake at the last moment I saw her. The face I was looking at wasn't hers. She was alone. I understood this. I really did. She needed me, that I was so sure of. But it was gone. She was gone. How does that happen?

I look at the notebook in front me, unable to keep myself from spilling out my feelings. Why did she do this? I could have saved her. Taken her from whatever life held over her. I wanted to be a friend. I could care less (I kind of did a little) what she felt about me. But how did I know what I was feeling was what I thought it was? How? That fucking word playing like an annoying Ashlee Simpson "song".

How do you love someone like Julie? Who is she? I’ve never been this intrigued by anyone ever. My eyes skimmed her handwriting, my fingers brushed along its contours and curves. I thought about her face, how she felt when we touched. I wanted to take her away from whatever pain she went through.

It was than my life changed here and now. My eyes felt like they fell on the floor. It was on ALL the pages too. Something I hadn’t noticed until my fingers discovered its meanings.

Aurora… “Who is that?”

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