Chapter 12: Giving In

She can't fall in love?! She said that in the dream. Oh god, she IS in love with me. She's just afraid. I gotta see if she's OK. He scrambled off the bed and went to the bathroom door, knocking gently, "Lana? Baby, are you OK?"

Why? Why is he bothering? I'm nothing. Just a stupid girl. I'm not Cameron. I'm not rich. Why does he care so much? Well, fuck! If sex is all he wants, than that's what he'll get. Fuck the abstinence shit. I want his body and he wants mine. He doesn't love me. I don't care. I'm just giving him what we both want. She stood up and shut the shower off. She opened the shower door and took off her shorts, leaving her in her bra and panties; still soaked. She marched to the door and flung it open. She looked at him with a mixture of pain, anger, lust. Eyes of nothing. Not love. There was no love there. No feeling. Emotions bound away and locked up. Just a meaningless fling about to occur.

His eyes grew wide at her soaked formed, "Oh god, you're soaked-" she put a finger to his lips strongly.

She grabbed his shirt in pure want, "Shut up!" she violently dropped a strong kiss on his lips. She wasted no time in shoving her tongue through his mouth, tasting all of him. She broke away pushing him towards the bed and when he fell on it, she straddled his body tightly.

She ripped his shirt off running her fingers over his smooth chiseled front. He was getting turned on for all the wrong reasons. He had to stop her while he still had some common sense left over. "Stop, Lana stop it!"

"Shut up, I said! I need to do this," she licked her lips as they nipped at his neck.

He sighed. He really shouldn't let her do any of this, but that mouth was doing things that just... wow. He can't explain. This is so wrong. OK, stop it now. "Lana, STOP! This is not you! Stop!"

"Don't you want me?" she tugged on his earlobe.

His breathing wore thin, "Ye-no! Not like this. Lana stop. I can't do this. Please come on. You don't either," he pulled her away and cupped her face.

"You said you wanted me, don't you?" she leaned and to kiss him again but he turned his face so she kissed his cheek.

"Not like this sweetie. I thought you have feelings for me. I thought you were ready. You're not and you know that."

"This is absurd, of course I'm ready! I want you so bad I'm about to explode! Now shut up and fuck me!" she angerly tried removing his belt from his jeans.

He had had enough, "No! I'm not doing this! I don't do that! I don't want to do that with you. You think I'm after sex? Is that it?" Even though he didn't have to ask.

She gave up, tears almost on board, "Isn't it? We're both in heat. Seems pausible to me. We want this," she unbuttoned his jeans.

His fingers stopped the ones on his zipper gently, "I don't. I don't want your body. I just can't do this. Please, stop now," his hand touched her cheer so lovingly that her eyes filled up with tears again, this time, slowly coming down.

Maybe he's different. But, why did he stop? Men don't stop sex. Something's wrong with him. NO, its gotta be something big. What is he hiding? "What are you saying?" she sniffed.

He squirmed to put some space between them, "I don't want to use you for sex. I would never do that."

She nodded slightly, curling her leg up her to create warmth, "Than explain what happened before I attempted to "rape" you?"

Why am I hiding my feelings for her? Just tell her. Tell her how you feel. Tell her what made you do what you did. "I guess I was caught up in the moment," he mentally smacked himself.

"Oh," her "oh" sounded so exhausting, like she was expecting more. I guess was wrong. He'll never feel that way about me. It WAS all lust. I gotta forget it.

"Well, I'm getting dressed. I guess I'll see you later," she stood up and went to her suitcase.

His heart crumbled when she turned her back to him. Was she mad? Does she really have feelings for me? I'm going crazy. I can't take this anymore, I gotta feel her again.

He got up and swiftly turned her around to face her. Licking his lips as they went down to claim hers ever so slowly. The kiss was slow and much calmer than the first two. She's actually kissing him back. He was in heaven. It wasn't out of heat, it was something else. Something almost magical. His hand cradled her face in a soft gesture. God, this is what she must be talking about when she told me about how beautiful the first kiss should be in that dream. Beautiful can't even fathom the moment taking place. It was poetry. Almost as if Shakespeare was reading the whole story and they were the actors. Only, this was not acting. This was the real thing. The real kiss. The one he'd been searching for. A kiss that breathes life into his heart. This kiss makes his lips never want to kiss anyone again. How's Cam gonna take the news. He has to tell her. He's not a cheater, but now they cross the final line and he has to.

Melana loves me, I love her, we will be together.

"Justin, where are you?" Cameron's voice sounded suddenly.

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